Satire

“When our town’s drive-in of 68 years closed, everyone was missing their signature dish. Most recipes nowadays are chunky and have things like beans in them…”

This recipe recreates the classic, rich, and slightly spicy flavors of a traditional chili parlor chili. It’s a hearty and comforting dish perfect for a cold day, featuring a blend of savory spices and a deep, robust flavor.

Ingredients:

IngredientQuantity
Olive oil1 tablespoon
Ground beef (90/10 or 80/20)1 pound
Beef or chicken broth2 cups
Tomato sauce or puree1/2 cup
Chili powder1 tablespoon
Unsweetened cocoa powder1 tablespoon
Worcestershire sauce2 teaspoons
Chili flakes2 teaspoons
Paprika2 teaspoons
Soy sauce2 teaspoons
Onion powder1 teaspoon
Garlic powder1 teaspoon
Cayenne pepper1/2 teaspoon
Kosher saltTo taste
Freshly ground black pepperTo taste

Instructions:

  1. Brown the ground beef: In a large pot, heat the olive oil over medium heat. Add the ground beef and use a spoon or spatula to break it up. Cook for 3 to 5 minutes, or until most of the pink is gone.
  2. Add remaining ingredients: Add the beef or chicken broth, tomato sauce or puree, chili powder, cocoa powder, Worcestershire sauce, chili flakes, paprika, soy sauce, onion powder, garlic powder, and cayenne pepper to the pot.
  3. Simmer the chili: Bring the mixture to a simmer, then reduce the heat to low. Cover the pot and cook for 35 to 40 minutes, stirring frequently to prevent the chili from sticking to the bottom.
  4. Season and serve: Season the chili with kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste. Serve hot.

Written by Chris Jorge

Chris is an author with a keen interest in space exploration and a flair for satirical commentary. Their extensive writing covers the latest breakthroughs in astronomy and astrophysics, as well as ongoing missions to explore our solar system and beyond. Besides their work on space topics, Chris is renowned for their satirical pieces, which often offer a humorous and irreverent take on modern issues and events. This distinctive combination of science and humor has garnered them a loyal following and numerous awards. When not writing, Chris enjoys stargazing with their telescope or perfecting their comedic talent at local open mic nights.

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